the lottery Jesus

Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory. I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. Rom 8:17-18

I don't know about you, but I am still trying to figure this one out.

When I came to the understanding of God's love and joy for me I knew that I was about to begin a long hard journey of reconciling my bad theology, my misconceptions, and my life experience with the truth of God. But knowing and even anticipating pale in comparison to experience.

How many books, how many sermons talk about the "blessed life"? They pump up the idea of name it claim it, call for it and it will come, of tithe so that heaven opens up. These guys on TV talk about hope and the prosperous life. But they never address the lottery effect of being a Christian.

The lottery effect: people walk into a store, buy a few tickets, hope and pray they will win big and most never do. They hope against hope, play against the odds, and believe that one day they will be just like the guy on TV, super rich without a care in the world.

I feel that way with God many times. But worse. I feel entitled to win the lottery. I feel like as His child I should be given all the blessings of the prosperous life here. I feel like the guy on TV is right. I see his life and think, wow he is blessed, why not me. I know, before you go off saying it, I am blessed, right? Don't get me wrong I am not discounting the things in my life, I am just not ignorant of the pain and suffering that sits on my table either.

The point is this, I see these guys, good guys. I am not talking about the obvious TV crazies, I am talking about the people we see and all admire. They speak well, have sound theology, and show genuine care for people. But what I get from them is the lottery effect.

I wonder when will I hit the jackpot with Jesus. I wonder when will I get to a place where I think, feel, and live the winning ticket. I wonder...and then I read that verse at the top. I read that verse and put the brakes on my lottery Jesus. I have to re-frame my whole life. I have to reconstruct my house cause my house of cards just came tumbling down. I read that verse and I have to discard all the televangelist BS. I read that verse and I have to come up with real answers. I can no longer ignore the elephant in the room. The two opposing truths must find peace. And that conflict is this: how can a loving, all powerful, caring, competent, merciful God, Father and Friend, fail to do for me what I would never fail to do for my own kids, friends, or enemy?

Yes that abundant life that is preached today is a fog that fades quickly when the burning sun of pain and suffering rise in the morning to guide your life.

I am on a journey to believe, love, follow, and trust a God who permits and brings me suffering. But first I must reconcile the idea of love and pain before I can embrace Him.

I have every confidence that I will have answers to the most difficult questions in life and never again lead people to the lottery Jesus.